Five Conveniences We've Fallen in Love With!

The first time Tony and I visited Europe was to celebrate our one year wedding anniversary.  We took a twelve-night Princess Cruise from Rome and immediately fell in love with the jaw-dropping sites - Venice, Athens, Santorini, Dubrovnick.  Our days were spent slurping gelato, strolling cobblestone streets and sitting in quiet churches admiring the centuries-old architecture. It was a dream...

Can you tell this was "pre-children"?!
(cue the sound of a record player coming to a screeching halt!)

We look back on that trip and recognize it was the first stepping-stone to getting us where we are today - living and breathing life in Barcelona, Spain!  The city truly is as romantic, alive, vibrant, inspiring and delicious as we remember Europe to be back then.

But seriously, when you're an expat living with three young ones in a foreign city you need more than a foamy cappuccino and an ancient cathedral (although these mind-blowing masterpieces will forever move me to tears) to make life smooth.  It can be the littlest things that have the biggest impact as a family - things we never knew we wanted, until we had them!

And we have found some fabulous ones here...

1. Chiringuitos

I'm still not even sure I pronounce this one right, but let's focus on what is really important here.  Three words.  BAR. ON. BEACH.  Not the kind of bars/restaurants we're used to in Jersey on an elevated walkway (called a boardwalk) set way back off the water usually requiring shoes & shirts (or no service!). When you have kids, leaving the sandy beach to go to one of these for a beer or pizza is more of a hassle, yes?  Packing an enormous cooler of food - also a tad exhausting.

The first time friends explained what these Chiringuitos were, I heard angels sing!

Picture a small covered structure planted only 25 feet from the sea with tables and chairs placed in the sand selling beer, cocktails and Spanish tapas dishes like calamari, patatas bravas, nachos.  I didn't even get to the best part yet....TOYS!  Tons of toys, play houses and climbing structures so you can relax and enjoy while keeping your kids happy and safe nearby.  Don't want to stay seated outside the bar?  No pasa nada, chicos! (No problem, guys!)  You're welcome to take your food and cocktails to wherever on the beach your crew is sitting, which is a huge NO-NO on most U.S. beaches.

Life is Good...

I mean, does anything more need to be said about this GENIUS idea?!

One of our favorites, Chiringuito Ibiza in Casteldefells, Barca

2. Cheap Admissions

As a family of five spending the day in a city can quickly become pricey!  So you can imagine how thankful (and pleasantly surprised) we are to have tons of unique places to go, some of which cost less than a combo meal at McDonald's!

The city's science museum, Cosmo Ciaxa, is impressive, interactive and intriguing - like Christmas morning for my science loving six-year old who could stare at their giant swinging pendulum representing the Earth's rotation for hours!  Best part - It costs 4 euro for adults and kids are GRATIS (free)!  Talk about a full day without an empty wallet.

What could be better than an afternoon surrounded by everything chocolate (including your admission ticket)?!  At Museo de Xocolata, we were wowed by magnificent sculptures made solely of you know what.  Everything from the FC Barcelona Stadium to a life-size Komodo Dragon!  Kids under seven go free and adults just 6 euros, which left plenty of money to fill our bellies at the decadent snack bar.

Admiring FCB player #10 Messi made of xocolata!

Museo de Picasso houses the largest collection of the famous Spanish artist's work.  Ehem, okay I know what you're thinking - this is literally the least child friendly outing EVER!!  But it's also a part of the Spanish culture not worth missing and we want the kids to appreciate it.  Plus, we try to turn these sorts of afternoons into games!  Who can find a funny painting? Who can find a scary one?  With Picasso's quirky abstract style, the kids mostly just laugh at each piece.  It turns into a fun day, trust me, but they're learning too - a nice bonus!  And since kids enter free here also, it  keeps us parents smiling. 

Currently in the dead of summer, I have to mention this last gem, as it's been a real savior!  Jardins de La Torre de Les Aigues, a public splash pool (I was slightly grossed out by the concept at first also, but we tried it once and have returned many times!) located in city center has all we need to keep cool and have fun when the temps are sweltering. Oh yea, and it costs less than 1.50 euro per person to spend the day! Major score...

Jardins de La Torre de Les Aigues splash pool

3. Cafe & Play

Another slice of heaven here in Barcelona that involves food/drink and play.  What more to life is there really?! 

I've walked into countless cafes/restaurants here to grab a croissant or latte and to my surprise found a children's area stocked with table & chairs, books, toys, crafts.  Normally I would take my order "to-go" (which people here rarely do I've noticed) to avoid the struggle of keeping three little ones quiet while I have my zen caffeine moment.  But these common sense business owners understand if the kids are happy, the parents are happy (and relaxed). And happy parents are returning customers!  DUH!  Similarly, we've found handfuls of restaurants with outdoor seating placed perfectly next to......you guessed it, a playground!

I mean, do the Spanish have it together or WHAT?!                       


4. Airport Security Lines

Have you ever wanted to just throw your arms around an airport security officer and KISS them?!  Nope, me neither....until recently!  We all know that waiting on line at airport security can be a true test of wills.  Now add three children, stroller, snacks, gaming tablets, passports and necessary documents, carry-on luggage (my daughter's Hello Kitty suitcase falling over for the hundredth time)  It's like dying a slow and painful death, people!

So the first time we left Barcelona to fly home, I was astonished when the security officer pointed us away from the massive crowd of travelers waiting to remove belts/shoes and instead towards a sign marked "Family Security Line".  Could this be real life?!  Practically no one else to wait behind, extra staff there to assist with bags, even a play pen to place tiny tots in while the rest of the family gets situated.  What could have been 30 minutes of pure hell turned into five minutes of bliss!  Kudos to ANY airport around the globe, not just BCN, that has this feature.  It's priceless...

Smiling travelers is a priceless thing!

5. Kids' Birthday Parties

The first time we were invited to one of my daughter's classmate birthday parties, I was excited and...actually kind of nervous!  We didn't know what to expect, who we might meet and what on EARTH to buy for the birthday kid himself. We quickly learned that gift cards aren't real big here so I racked my brain thinking of the perfect present for someone I had never even met before.  I typically love shopping for gifts, but this was one was a little tricky!

Until one miraculous day I was informed by another mother about the group gift concept.  It's FABULOUS!  Basically, each parent from the class contributes 5-10 euro and with all the money collected, the class will give one BIG gift to the birthday child.  Parents appreciate it because of the ease and convenience - it really takes the guess work out.  The child loves the WOW factor that comes with opening a big beautifully wrapped present.

The gift is opened at the party, the children all cheer and it becomes a real celebratory part of the party!  Sometimes less is more, huh?

As we continue on our exploration of life in Barcelona, this list will surely grow. So stay tuned for more about the conveniences we have fallen in love with here!  And an upcoming post about some American conveniences we so dearly miss...

The Kindness of Strangers

When it comes to blogging, I first thought I would write in chronological order starting with the decision to move abroad, then how we told our children and next, how we shared the news with our families. 

But after the last two posts I'm in need (and maybe you too!) of something a little bit lighter.  Kind of like the intermezzo sorbet at a wedding after a heaping cocktail hour and pasta course ha!  Or like watching an episode of The Office after a Netflix binge of This Is Us.  I think you get the point...

Truth be told, I agreed to move to Barcelona having never even been here before. No pressure at all, right!?  Call it an enormous leap of faith, but also one of the most exciting parts of our move. The unknown waiting to be discovered.  And anyone that's visited a major European city before knows, they do NOT disappoint...  Our expectations were HIGH!

But actually, there was something I was a little disappointed about....at first.  It was one of those "first impression" things that kind of sticks with you.

People here didn't seem to smile much! 

Not what you were expecting me to say? 

Well, it bothered me!  I know it seems silly, but a major city is an overwhelming place at first, especially when you are bringing your entire family across the world there...to live!  Plus, there's something comforting about a friendly exchange of smiles between strangers, like, "Hey, we're both walking around on this Earth together...and I don't bite!"

When passing by folks on the street here, no smile. When standing at a checkout line, no grin.  At the bus stop, nope!  People just seemed to looked straight-ahead, almost through you, so as not to be bothered.   Especially when climbing onto an crowded but otherwise completely quiet bus (that is, of course until our Jersey family crew piles on: stroller, screaming toddlers, musical toys and generally loud presence - sorry, not sorry!)  But otherwise...blank stares.

What was up with people here and why did they look so pissed all the time?

That stoic look - maybe this was a Spanish thing?  Maybe this was just city life, which neither Tony or I had been exposed to living in until now.  Hell, maybe we were just spoiled with our Italian American northeast culture of upbeat greetings, chit-chat and long-winded "HIIIIII's".   

What the heck was I expecting anyway, a red carpet welcome reception to be rolled out for the Smith Family with glasses of cava (a most delicious Spanish champagne) and double-cheek smooches?! 

I decided I would smile anyway.  Be polite!  Bring some cheer wherever I went.  I remember reading somewhere that a smile, even when you have to force it, releases endorphins in the brain and actually makes a person feel happier and less stressed.  So you can imagine what a difference a smile from a stranger during those first few crazy days of settling in would have made. 

Then one day, thankfully, I started seeing things differently.  I was riding the bus (yup, we rely completely on mass transit here) and had the baby in her stroller.  As we approached our stop, I began rolling towards the double doors to exit.  Suddenly a man bent down and grabbed the front of my stroller!

Was he trying to kidnap London?!  "Yo ayuda, ayuda!" he said to me. 
To that I thought, "Ay-WHO-da?!"  My protective mama bear instinct was flaring up fast...

Then I realized he was actually helping me (ayuda!) off the bus. Sigh*

You idiot!  I made an embarrassing mental note. Must learn Spanish, must learn Spanish.

It took me by surprise, but I welcomed his help and quickly replied "Muchas gracias!"  Few days later, I was carrying a heavy bag of groceries while pushing the baby and a woman sharply dressed for work (in heels might I add), grabbed the bag from my hand and insisted on helping me to my building...three blocks away!

Another "Seriously?!" moment for me - but also a heart-warming one. 

I started studying the people of Barcelona more.  Looking beyond the surface of a smile exchange between two people.  I realized my first real cultural lesson in our new city was unfolding.  The kindness of strangers. 

Did either one of those people flash their pearly whites in the process of helping me?  Not necessarily...but their insistent gestures suggested more than a polite smile would.  It seemed to be their duty, an obligation almost, to help one another (Spanish or not) because it's what......

We. Should. Do.  People going out of their way for one another, for no special reason or recognition.

In the following weeks I saw tons of examples of people giving up their seats on the bus for an elderly person, helping folks with canes or on crutches cross a busy street, strangers bending down to play with my kids if they were fussing, passer-bys alerting me when the baby dropped her shoe (or blanket or pacifier or countless other things!) on the sidewalk. 

That first stroller incident that stunned me?  It now takes place all the time. And of course I now welcome it ha!

One night, Anthony fell asleep on the bus ride home from basketball practice. Seeing I had my hands full with two other children, a nice woman picked all 50 pounds of him up in her arms as if he were her own child and carried him off for me. I was astonished and grateful!

Why? 

Because the first few months of being an expat can feel lonely.  No family, no friends yet.  But because of these complete strangers, I felt as if there were others looking out for me.  It's the little things in life, isn't it?

During the second week of school, a girl I had only met once before approached me on the play yard. Her son was in Anthony's class.  She explained that she drives her children to school every morning and passes me and my three little ones waiting at the bus stop.

"I see you each morning. I need to take your kids to school for you," she insisted. I thought she was joking so I politely laughed it off.  Again, she said "No, I need to do this for you. I have a car and you don't!"  I couldn't believe it - this girl barely knew me.  But winter was approaching and I knew what a huge help this would be to us.  So I gladly accepted and that mom has become a great friend.  That simple offer has turned into a wonderful friendship here in Barcelona and now my son's closest friend from class.  She didn't have to, but she did - and didn't think twice about it.

I started to really build trust in the people here and so did my kids.

Something very rewarding happens in the moment when you go from "tourist" status to "local resident" in a foreign city, something I would only be exposed to as an expat living here.  The city even feels less overwhelming when I walk around knowing that if I ever needed help, someone would be there to jump right in. It helped me to appreciate and even love the Spanish/Catalan culture - rich and deeply rooted, genuine and not forced.

It starts to feel a bit more like...a place we can call home.




   



   

Along for the ride...

Revealing a surprise to your children like a trip to Disney or a new swimming pool is one of the most enjoyable parts of being a parent.  And for anyone that has had to share less enjoyable news, maybe the death of a family pet, you soon realize this is one of the hardest parts.

As thrilled as Tony and I were for this next chapter of our family's life, relocating to Barcelona, I was worried sick about telling the kids. When our realtor asked to stake a "For Sale" sign on the front lawn, we told her no!  Who does that?  We wanted to avoid the kids raising questions - especially from our five-year old, who notices EVERY-thing including when the neighbors came home with a rental car after an auto accident.  Plainly put, he keeps us on our toes!  To us, our move was exciting news. To Anthony and Autumn, I wasn't so sure.

How would we even deliver the news?!  "Hey kids, Mommy and Daddy have made a decision that will completely turn your lives upside down and guess what?  You're just along for the ride."  Ugh, the butterflies seemed to be eating away at the lining in my stomach. Would we break their little hearts?

I prayed they wouldn't cry or worse...hate us forever.   

Okay readers, I promise not ALL of my posts will be this emotional (just wait for the hilarious one about how we explained topless beaches in Spain to the kids ha!) and have you yearning towards the fridge for a comforting tub of Ben & Jerry's. Although, I'll admit, I have gone through several tubs myself just writing this one...

A week after our relocation decision was made, I was attending my son Anthony's nursery school Mothers' Day Tea.  This was my absolute favorite event of the year.  Each mommy received a bouquet of paper tulips with sugar gumdrops inside (although three of my four gumdrops already had all the sugar licked off, ahem), a hand-print craft (which as fellow moms know, are worth more than a pair of red-soled Louboutins!) and were served sprinkle cookies with iced tea.  The class performed skits and upbeat songs while the moms exchanged humble smiles and giggles to one another.

And then his teacher cued up the music to one last tune. A sweet melody called "Count on Me" by Bruno Mars. Suddenly my brain was filled with memories and my eyes filled with tears. Warm baby snuggles, stumbling first steps, nighttime feedings, first words and countless other milestones that get documented in the baby book but soon forgotten during the tumultuous and trying toddler years.

Those tiny little preschool voices filled that room of sniffling mothers...

"If you ever find yourself stuck in the middle of the sea...I'll sail the world...to find you.
If you ever find yourself stuck in the dark and you can't see...I'll be the light...to guide you."

And something inside told me exactly what my little boy and his sisters needed to hear from their Mommy and Daddy.

Several weeks later after school was out for the summer, we felt the time was right.  Still unsure of how both Anthony and Autumn might react, we decided to tell them separately.  Allow them to feel honest emotion without influence from the other.  This was the right move.

My daughter, who is bouncy, chatty, funny and fearless responded with a simple, "Well.....I really like our house. Can I take my room with me...like, all of these walls!?"  To that, we giggled with relief and responded yes. "Can I take my dollhouse with me?" And the list went on of her personal belongings and the reassurance she needed that it would all come with us. Sigh* That went well!

But she was the easy one to share the news with and Tony and I both knew it.

When it was time for Anthony, we chose a quiet part of the house free of interruption. I handed him a gift bag, similar to one also prepared for his sisters. Excitedly, as all five-year olds would do, he tore through the tissue paper and pulled out a hat.  On the front was the symbol for FCB (Futbol Club Barcelona for our American football friends!) Next was a framed photo of our family.  And last, a book titled Undercover Spy Adventures in Barcelona.  

"Hey buddy," my husband started and put his hand on our son's arm, "You know how one of our favorite things to do is go exploring and find new adventures in the neighborhood?"

"Sure Daddy," he answered.

"Well, Mommy and Daddy are very excited to tell you about a new very special adventure.  And the best part is that we get to do it all together as a family!"  Anthony's eyes were wide now. "We are going to be moving to another part of the world in Spain to a city called," and he grabbed the book, "Barcelona."  And there was a pause.

I would love to end this post on a real high and tell you that Anthony jumped for joy at our news!  Truth is, he didn't. He threw his head back, put his hands over his face and started to cry.  His first words were, "I don't want to move! I like it here!"  Tony and I looked at one another and I'll admit, I was useless at that moment.  None of the responses I rehearsed in my mind could find their way to my mouth. Luckily, Tony had comforting words about all the exciting things this new adventure would bring.

Then he did something that I have such a hard time with as a mom.  He took my hand and motioned for us to walk away. Leave Anthony on the couch to thumb through his new book and allow him to really process the news.  As difficult as this was for me, I agreed it was the very best move.  Sometimes as parents, we just need to stop talking. Stop comforting. Stop explaining. And let our children navigate their own emotions.

An hour later, I was in the kitchen washing dishes. I felt a little hand tap me on the leg and I turned to see my son standing there.  "Mommy?" he asked.  "Yes sweetheart," I answered.  And the part that came next I will never forget.

My five-year old said in a quiet voice to me, "I am sorry for being so sad before with you and Daddy. I am excited about Barcelona!" I had a golf ball in my throat at that moment but said nothing. Just squeezed him hard.  For a long time.

Thin threads in life always seem to amaze me.  This next one gives me chills.  The entire first year of school in Spain has come to an end for my children and to celebrate the occasion, Anthony's class performed a Summer Show.  Had it really been one year since that special Mothers' Day Tea?  So much had changed since then.  My once little boy was now one of the tallest in his class!

And then to my utter amazement, his teacher cued up the music to one last song and I couldn't believe my ears.  The same familiar tune sang just one year earlier began to play.  "If you ever find yourself stuck in the middle of the sea..." As Anthony's class, filled with the faces of students from all over the world who were complete strangers only twelve months ago, started singing, I looked at my son with tears in my eyes.

He looked back at me.

We both smiled.

And in my heart, I knew the initial pain was worth this ultimate reward.  The adventure for our family had really just begun.

Anthony & Autumn on the first day at their new school
here in Barcelona 

Sure.....I'll blog.

Nine months ago my husband Tony and I started wondering. Asking questions. Dreaming.  Believing.

Our third daughter, London Olivia (no, she was not conceived in London and yes, we have been asked that more times than you can imagine!) was five months old, barely crawling, when we fell in love with the idea of moving abroad.

We weren't unhappy in New Jersey where we were both born and raised, where both of our families all lived and where we knew our three children would have a great upbringing. But we also had that itch.  The kind of itch that doesn't go away.  The kind that whispers, "what if?" We wanted to know what else was out there for us.

Personally, I blame the show House Hunters International on HGTV!  It's a favorite of ours and the more we watched episodes of families relocating to incredible parts of the world, we began to realize the same dream for our own. And with my husband's job, it could very likely become a reality.  But could we really do it?  And with young kids, practically babies?  Go from suburbia to city?  What about our home? What about my furniture restoration business that was on the grow? Schooling for the kids? Our families? Our friends?

What if we HATED it?!

But....what if we loved it?

My questions kept coming in the weeks to follow.  I fired off one after another to Tony like a drill sergeant. And this is why he is great for me.  A dreamer but not overly emotional. Decisive but not impulsive (except for that one time when he had to buy a miter saw...followed by a must-have table saw!)  Anyway, he calmly sat down over hot cups of coffee at breakfast or in between cheering at my son's soccer games or while in the middle of pushing the lawn mower across our front yard - and answered every. single. question.  Until I had no more.  Our move was the first thing I would think of when I opened my eyes each morning.  It was my last thought laying in the dark and staring at the ceiling each night. I'm a thinker. Okay, a massive over-analyzing worrisome thinker.

One morning, I drove to the beach (known to locals as the Jersey Shore and despite how the TV show represents it, the shore is actually bea-u-tiful!) I sat on a bench watching the water (something about doing that brings people such clarity, doesn't it?) and thought to myself, "If we don't do this, we will forever regret it.  We will always wonder." And that was enough to know.

By mid-summer, we had made the decision. We were Barcelona bound!  Our home was up for sale. We shared the news with our families (more on this in a future post!), made the announcement to our children in a way they could understand (even MORE on this in a future post! I guess you could say, I have a lot to share about our experience here that the "highlight reel" on Facebook doesn't tell). I finished up the last handful of furniture projects for my customers (a more painful process for me than I thought). Boxes and bubble wrap sat in our hallways waiting patiently to be filled with our precious memories.  There was no turning back.

And so the adventure began. Nine months later, we are still pinching ourselves.

I always laughed at the thought of starting a blog. Why would people want to read about my personal experiences?  I'm no scholar! Hell, I still don't know how to whistle according to my six-year old who continues to remind me. Then a dear friend at the kids' school here in Barcelona said those exact words to me, "You should start a blog! You have three kids. You moved across the world.  You went from suburbia to city sidewalks. You have so much to share that others could benefit from!" I laughed and brushed it off.  Naaah.

Then she waved me down at school one day and handed me a book - all about blog writing.  And I knew she meant what she said (another topic related to cultural transparency that I am excited to share here soon! People here are blunt...and it's awesome!)  I began to think, maybe she was right.

So, here I am.  A wife of almost ten years.  A mother of three amazingly entertaining, exhausting, loving and bright young children. A lover of writing, restoring furniture, interior decorating, laughing, photography, exploring new adventures, and eating (but not cooking, I don't love cooking).  And most recently, an expat who with my husband and children made the biggest and scariest decision of our lives - to leave our satisfying and comfortable life in the United States and relocate to the heart of European culture, history and style in Barcelona, Spain.

My only regret so far after almost one year in our new home? That I didn't start this blog sooner.

Looking forward to sharing our journey, travels, struggles and so much more.

The last picture of our littles in front of our NJ home.

There's something amazing about capturing a photo like this.
Watching my husband film the moving truck as it pulled away from our home.

What used to be our dining room...

Our little firecracker helping us pop champagne in our empty house.

As a parent, you must just go with the flow sometimes!

The kids' playroom has NEVER looked so clean!

Letting kids be kids among endless packing materials.

The morning of our departure to the airport. Goodbye Jersey!